Monday, August 23, 2010

Chapter 2: I willingly accept.

First off let me say that I really hope to update this a lot more than once a month. There is just so much that I need to put down on the cyber paper to get up to date as to where we are. If you read this, please bear with me and I promise more goodies in the future. So where were we...

Ahh yes, when we last left off I was smack dab in the middle of I-20 somewhere between the 'Ham and the ATL. I was also smack dab in the middle of a crossroads that God was calling me too. Kind of like that red pill vs. blue pill thing in the Matrix. So which one do I choose. One path would keep me on my current road of being comfortable and taken care of. To live out the rest of my days with my wonderful wife and precious little girl, with the occasional vacation thrown in here and there and some good times and I'm sure our fair share of bad times as well, although we've seen enough of those to be good for a while. I can't complain though, I am still blessed beyond measure. That sounds like it would be a pretty good path to take as it is the same one I have been on for a couple of years now, but something all along has been missing. You see old Yoda was right back in the real Star Wars movies, not the last 3, but the first three which were actually the last three. Anyway, I think it was in The Empire Strikes Back that Yoda explains to Luke that anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering, yayaya, you know that whole line. Well, that was my life. To put it another way, comfort had led to isolation, isolation had led to depression, depression leads to lifelessness, and, well lifelessness is just another word for death, except that you are still breathing, albeit selfishly taking air away from those who are living and really need it. I hope that makes sense, if not then oh well I know what I mean and you can ask me a question by leaving a comment on here. I didn't want to continue existing as a barely breathing skinny sack of bones. That's not who I want my wife to be married to, or my daughter to be fathered by, or my friends and family to see as an example of light in this world...the light i was giving off wouldn't fire up a lightning bug's butt (see you can take the boy out of South Georgia, but you can't take the South Georgia out of the boy. Much love to my hometown, Titletown USA.). In other words, I ain't going out like that. I said as much to God that day!

So I guess that leaves me with only one option, and I think God knew that. Funny how He puts you in a place to hear from Him when you really have no other choice BUT to hear from Him. He's done it to me before, but that is another chapter for another day. So God knows, because He is God and He knows everything, that I have always wanted to get a motorcycle, but that was a dream I had long given up. You know, because it's not practical, it's not safe, and besides, I'll shoot my eye out....oops sorry, wrong movie reference there. Anyway, what do you think of when you think about a motorcycle? Yeah I thought so, and that is what I thought too, CRAZY! No way I can get a bike, not with a 2 year old who needs her daddy around. So that dream was long since buried, covered with dirt so long and decomposing so badly you could probably smell it from where you are. Well in one fail swoop, God came in and knocked all that dirt off and brought my dream to life much the same way Jesus brought back Lazarus. God called my dream Lazarus and yelled loudly "Lazarus come out!". God reminded me of that dream and I argued about the whole crazy aspect of having a bike and how it wasn't safe and how my wife would never let me have one and this and that and yeah He wasn't really buying what I was selling. He pretty much said "I got that, let me handle the hard part, you just follow.". Oh, okay, so it's real easy to go home and share this with my wife and her not think I've lost my mind, not to mention all the other folks who look at me and think, "yep, that's a mid-life crisis if I've ever seen one". He pretty much tells me one step at a time and He will open the doors. Okay, I say, I'm supposed to get a bike, now what the hay am I supposed to do with it? I've never been on a motorcycle before, at least not one that goes faster than 40 mph and I didn't have to wear a big red helmet that made me look like Kool-Aid's half cousin. God said to me plain as day, "you will get a bike, you will ride it across this country to raise awareness and support for Cystic Fibrosis, and you will give hope to those who may have none and encourage dreams for those who are sleep walking. You will take your story, and make my name known.". Uh, okay...oh crap, maybe the comfortable life sounds a little better. Too late for that...

5 comments:

  1. Kool Aid's half-cousin made me laugh out loud! I am so inspired by you, so proud to be your friend/sister, and love you all! I'm cheering you on!!

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  2. I also had to laugh out loud! Lining up beside Amanda to cheer you on to success!!

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  3. I'm in on the cheering section! Go for it!!!

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  4. Really inspiring Brian-- can't wait to follow your journey!

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  5. This was ABSOLUTELY GREAT Bri. I know I may be one of your "biggest fans and supporters, as your Mom, but it was entertaining as well as inspiring. I Love You!!

    Mom

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